Who else can understand? Who else can I share when I have to keep quiet just to maintain the peace and unity of the church and also to protect myself from accused of protesting against a church?
It's hard to flow with the church crowd, esp when the crowd is going to a different direction. I am in a difficult situation because I am a member of the church and I still commit myself for the reformation of the church, even by means of merely praying and be a catalyst of encouragement.
The truth shall set you free? I am free indeed when I am getting to know more about God's Word, but knowing the truth about our church, it is binding and I am feeling the woes.
Does God still love this church? I decide to stay because God still loves this church, but it can get worse if the church keeps on shoving Christ to the sidelines and pay attention only with the "relationship" and goodness deeds in the church. Does God still love this church? If God has taken his love for this church, then it is time for me to leave.
Another thing that I can't leave this church is that I'm still using its benefits. The books, the minds or "wisdom" of the pastors, the church activities which I can enjoy practicing my gratitude to God, the support when there's a need. Like I said, it is binding.
